Anita Philiposian and Ken Murphy
Anita: I’d had one or two long relationships. People kept trying to fix me up — at a certain age, when you’re an unmarried female, everyone wants to put you together with someone. But it felt like I was on some kind of reality show — awkward and strange.
I lived in Swarthmore for 11 years and taught for quite a while. Now I have a cleaning business. Anyway, Ken and I became friends when I was bartending at Generations in Media, where he grew up. We hung out. I was dating other guys; he had gotten out of a bad relationship, we had both been single for a while. Every time I was with him I would always feel it was so easy, never any pressure. It was just so easy to spend time together, but I never saw myself with him because I thought we were so opposite. We were just best friends.
The first time Ken and I went to Swarthmore Presbyterian Church together, he stopped, looked around and said, “We are going to get married in this church.” I literally threw my head back, laughed and said, “You’re crazy! I will never marry you.”
Around the holidays in 2013, I was very upset. If you are single, it can be a very lonesome time. I was lamenting to a close friend, and she said, “You’re very spiritual. Make a list of every quality you want in a life partner. You put that on the wall and pray about it; you tell God that’s what you want.” So I immediately wrote the list of 25 or 30 inner qualities.
Later, Ken and I were on the phone — we had been friends for quite some time by then — and I was complaining about some guy and he just said, very calmly, “What are you doing? You’re wasting your time, because you belong with me.” I said, “You don’t know what you’re talking about. I’ve got to go.” And I hung up, but as I turned around, this list is right there, and I’m reading it, and I said, “Damn it, he was right!”
Ken says “I just sat there like a cat, and I waited, and I waited…” It was finally the right time. And in some ways he knows me better than I know myself. I never wanted a big wedding, to be the center of attention. I thought I’d just elope, and he said, “Trust me, you’re going to want this wedding.” And I’m so thankful that we did it just the way we did last October, in the same church, two years after that first visit.
Ken Murphy is owner of Murphy Construction in Media, a general contractor specializing in old homes. Anita Philiposian owns a housecleaning and personal services firm serving clients in Swarthmore, Wallingford and Media.